The wind talks back
My bones are shifting in my skin
And you, my love, are gone"
- Ingrid Michaelson - The Chain
That sounds as horrifying as it was. My love being photography.
I had been so caught up in creating for others, that I completely lost my own drive to create. I had no inspiration, no urge, no will to go out and 'just do it'. And to be honest, that scared me.
In the last few years the only thing that's been consistent in my work, is that I kept on doing self-portraits, for none other than myself. And that may sound selfish or narcissistic, but it's quite the contrary. I don't photograph myself as a beauty queen. I don't photograph myself as the best version of me. I'm not even recognizable in a lot of the images that I create.
But why do I create?
Because I couldn't be, without it.
I tell stories through my images. And it's not about imposing my stories to the viewer. It's about creating. From emotion, with emotion and to convey emotion. That's all there is to it.
And so when I lost my love last year. I had no idea what to do.
Thankfully, I have a group of photography friends from all over the world and they organised a photo a day challenge for the month of December. Before that, I hadn't created a single self-portrait for a month and a half. Not that there were no ideas, because ideas will flow through all the time. I just lacked the courage, the drive and the urge to go out and create anymore. And that saddened me.
So I decided to participate in the self-portrait a day challenge for the month of December and slowly started to regain my love again. Even if you have no idea what you're going to shoot. Sometimes it's just a matter of getting out there and go with what your heart is telling you. Sometimes you need a little push from someone you love, in case you're not capable of pushing yourself in that moment in time. Is that weak? I don't think so. We're not alone in this. We've all been there, haven't we?
how did you manage to rekindle that love again?